Breaking up is hard to do. And breaking up is even harder when a random bride makes the end of your relationship all about her. Check out my friend’s story.
“My boyfriend and I were dating for four years and living together, and we had talked about getting engaged. One of his friends made him a groomsman in his wedding, and the bride, who I’m not that close with, asked me to be a bridesmaid. I was surprised to be asked, but I said yes.
A few weeks before the wedding, I stumbled upon a plane ticket in our apartment. It was for my boyfriend for a trip I didn’t know about. I confronted him and he confessed to cheating on me–he was planning on taking a vacation with some girl. We broke up and I moved out.
Being a responsible bridesmaid, I contacted the bride right away to let her know what happened. I told her it would be too painful for me to see my ex (who I was paired with for our walk down the aisle) and I hoped she’d understand why I wouldn’t be attending her wedding. I also told her I wouldn’t be coming to her bachelorette party because I’d be a Debbie Downer and I wouldn’t want to ruin her fun.
I was expecting the bride to be understanding–maybe even relieved because we’re not that close–but instead, she got annoyed with me! She told me that if I didn’t walk down the aisle, I’d throw off the wedding party numbers–she had an equal amount of bridesmaids and groomsmen and everyone was walking with their girlfriend or boyfriend. Once I made it clear that I absolutely wasn’t going to the wedding, she insisted I at least attend her bachelorette party. She said going ‘would be good for me,’ despite the fact that I barely know anyone who’d be there. Next time, I’ll be a lot more careful about accepting someone’s invitation to be a bridesmaid!”
I think this bride was fairly heartless for trying to guilt my friend into remaining a bridesmaid, but what do you think? If you had just found out the guy you thought you’d marry was cheating on you, would you be willing to walk down the aisle with him at a wedding for a couple you don’t know well? If you were the bride, would a last-minute drop-out like this bug you or would you understand her reasons?
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